Persuasion - one step at a time

A week or so ago I broached the subject of attending the Arrowsmith program with A-One.

A-One: Well I'm not going!

Mum: A-One, this program could really help you!  For example, if you wanted to do a course at TAFE, you could find it easier than when you were at school.  It could help you learn better.  You remember that you found writing difficult at school?  It could help you do that better.

A-One: I didn't find writing difficult.  It was what to write.

Mum: Yes, that's right.

A-One: Anyway, I'm not going!

Mum: This is very serious A-One.  When we're gone, what will you do? Where will you live? How will you get your groceries? Who will help you manage your insurances? Health cover? Tax returns? Your pension?  It's not right to those who love you, nor to the Australian public who fund your pension, if you don't take up an opportunity which may help you be able to do those things for yourself!  Surely you'll at least try it?

A-One: No, I'm not doing it!

Mum: This is so serious, we'll have to start thinking about making it a condition of you living in this house.

A-One: You can't do that!

Mum: You are 23 years of age and you need to be thinking about living more independently.

A-One: I'm not going anywhere!

Mum: What are you objecting to so much?

A-One: I don't need it.

Mum: And yet you don't have a job, nor a driver's licence, nor able to take on responsibilities that others your age are already doing.

A-One: That's not my fault! Employers should give me a job!  They should give me a chance!

Mum: Don't you want to give yourself the best chance?

A-One: Yes, but I'm not that bad. I don't need it.

Mum: That's right. You're quite capable of many things. But this program is for people who are already good at some things, but have some blockages in their brain that stop them from doing other things.

A-One: I'm not doing it.

Mum: A-One. Has it been your experience that people often get frustrated with you? That they lose patience with you? For all your life so far?

A-One: Yes.

Mum: Do you want it to be that way for the rest of your life?  Do you think we want it that way? There's a chance your life could be different in a way you don't yet know. Don't you think we'd want your life to be one where people no longer get impatient with you?

He started giggling.  Not because he found it funny. It was his emotive response.

A-One: Stop talking about it.  I'm not doing it.

Mum: Well, you've assessed that you don't need this program.  What about the people who are offering the program?  Don't you think they'd be able to tell whether you're a suitable candidate?  If we put in an expression of interest, that doesn't mean you'd automatically be doing the program.  They might decide that it wouldn't really help you, and you'd be right after all.  Couldn't we at least see what they say?

I can't quite recall if he said anything after that. It seemed to me he was still intransigent, so I thought I'd draw round one to a close.  I knew it would take some time for him to get used to the idea, even if just to agree to an expression of interest.

That evening, his father said to me simply, 'He's doing it.'  He went to A-One's room to talk it over with him.

After about 20 minutes, his father reported that A-One had agreed to the expression of interest.

The chorus (A-One's youngest sister) commented: Gee, I was expecting there to be shouting and tears over this tonight, but it was all very calm and controlled. Wow.

I'm not sure where the magic happened.

A-One may be right.  This program may not be the right one for him.  It's for people with average or above average intelligence, and in the past A-One's tests put him at low average - yet still in the average range.

At least we have a chance to find out now.

Turbo in waiting?

A-One's fortnightly appointment with his employment consultant falls due tomorrow, and he is meant to have had at least 8 employer contacts since the last meeting.  That was his 'homework' for the last meeting, and the one before that too, but the dog ate it both times.

I reminded him yesterday that we'd better get down to the shopping centre today if he is not to be embarrassed about not having done his homework.

Mum: When do you want to get started tomorrow?

A-One: Early.

Mum: What time is 'early'?

A-One: I don't know. Just early in the morning.

Mum: Well, early in the morning could mean 5am.

A-One: Not that early.

Around 10am, after I had finished my exercise, I woke him.  I calculated that he might be ready by the time I'd finished my shower.

Mum: Time to wake up.  We going to the shopping centre today?

A-One: What for? ... Oh, yeh.

Mum: So get up.  Have breakfast.  Do you need to shower?  Also, empty the dishwasher before we go too.  Get cracking.  We're not going down there at 4pm because that will not be enough time.  And if you leave it until lunch time, the people you want to see may be on lunch.  Come on.  Time to get up and at 'em.

We have had a few exchanges in the intervening hours in response to my
'A-One, what's happening?'s:

A-One: I've only just finished my breakfast ... What should I wear? .... I'm just getting dressed .... I need to check something in my resume ....  I'm just getting something ....

It's now past 2pm.  It appears not a creature is stirring ... I'd better go see what's happening again.

Status Check

A-One hasn't done much brain training over the last month - just one day in the last four weeks.  His last score on Lumosity was 45th percentile, comprising the following sub-percentiles:

• Speed: 72.4
• Memory: 60.1
• Attention: 46.8
• Flexibility: 53.9
• Problem Solving: 9.1

All of the above are well within the average range, except Problem Solving.  I reckon his overall BPI would be higher than 45th percentile if he learnt his number facts.

So, has anything changed for A-One from his brain training?

When he met with his employment consultant yesterday discussing kitchen hand work, I noticed that he worked out how many years he'd been cleaning up the kitchen at home when I said he'd been rostered on that job since he was at least 8 years old.  Next week he turns 23.  He casually slipped into his conversation 'So, I've been doing that for 15 years.'  No pause, no counting on fingers.

I've also been noticing that his conversations as he plays WOW with his online friends are quite coherent and not all one-way.  Quite different from just a few years ago when he'd get on to a topic and keep talking regardless of signals that it was time to let someone else speak, or to inquire after them.  It all sounds very regular to me.

He now needs to build his confidence, and become motivated to get out of his comfort zone at home.

The best laid plans ...

At his meeting with his employment consultant yesterday, A-One reported on the job ads he had found interesting over the last fortnight, even if just a little.

A-One: There was one that required some packaging of orders, with some reception and admin work.  But they wanted someone who could 'work under pressure', and 'answer phone calls at reception'.

Consultant: Let me stop you right there.  How do you know if your idea of pressure is the same as their idea of pressure? You don't really know until you try.  When you think maybe you can't do it, I want you to put those thoughts away, and give it a go.  It's a good to be in the habit of applying, and good practice if you get an interview.  And when they say they want experience? Remember, you say you are willing to learn.

A-One: Yes.

Consultant: As you say, you might not find cleaning jobs really interesting, but you need to start somewhere, and from there you can work on to other jobs that you like better.

Mum: Yes, over the last fortnight, I heard A-One say for the first time ever 'working my way up'!

Consultant: Yes, that's how it can work. Will you get to your 8 employer contacts for our next meeting?

A-One: Yes, I'll do that.

On the way home, the plan had been to go via the shopping centre so that A-One could drop in his resume at his targeted shops (electronic gaming), as well as be on the look out for those looking for staff.

Mum: We'll just stop by home first so that you can swap the thongs for some shoes.

A-One: So, we're going home first now?  ... I really need a haircut too.

Mum: We could do that right now if you like.

A-One: OK.   Now, (consulting his iPod notes) how do I pay for this with my card again? Do I press credit or savings?

The haircut and payment duly executed, we headed for the 'quick' stop at home. He headed for the toilet.

Thirty minutes later:

Mum: A-One, how long will you be?  We'll run out of time!

A-One: We won't do it this afternoon.

After he emerged, he sat at his computer:

Mum: So when do you want to go down to the shopping centre?

A-One: I don't know.

Mum: If you need my help to get there, or to help you practice what to say before you talk to employers, you need to give me a time.  But if you go there on the bus, or walk, then it's up to you.

A-One: I don't know!  I need to think about it.

Mum: OK. How long do you think you'll need to think about it?

A-One: I don't know!

I moved on to something else.  Another day, another try ...

Job Hunting?

A-One and I had an appointment with his employment consultant again yesterday.  He had been given 'homework' - to have 8 employer contacts (submitted his resume) in the preceding fortnight.

Since the last appointment I had been reminding him about looking up the job sites in the way his consultant had shown him, or heading down to the local shopping centre to hand in his resume.  Despite his insistence to the contrary, as far as I could tell not much had been happening because he usually asks me questions when he's perusing jobs.

I woke him at 11:30am for a 1pm appointment.  At 12:30pm, he stepped dressed from the shower:

A-One: We should go down to the shopping centre before our meeting.

Mum: We don't have time for that now.  We have to leave here by 12:45pm at the latest to make it to the appointment by 1pm.

A-One: Yes, we'll have time.  I can't really go with nothing to show.

Mum: I'm glad to see you realise your obligations, but it needs more time than we have right now.  We simply won't make it by 1pm if we go down to the shopping centre now.

A-One: How do you know that? All I have to do is eat my breakfast and clean my teeth and then we can go to the shopping centre.

I left it as a rhetorical question until he had finished his food and cleaned his teeth.  By that time it was 1:45pm.

Mum: Are you ready to go now?

A-One: Yes.

Mum: You realise we're only just going to make it to the meeting?

A-One: Okay Mum.  You don't have to keep going on about it.

I went out to the car with A-One following me. He then rushed upstairs saying he'd forgotten something.  By the time we were backing out the driveway, it was 4 minutes to 1pm.

A-One: What will I say?

Mum: What do you think you might say?

A-One: I don't know.  That's why I'm asking you.

Mum: You'll have to call (consultant) to let him know we will be late.  (This happens for just about every meeting.)

A-One (on his mobile): Just calling to let you know we'll be a bit late.  We're on our way ... No, I didn't get around to that ... yes, we can talk about it soon.

A-One (off the phone): So, what should I say?

Mum: Well, what have you done in the last fortnight?

A-One: I've been looking, but I don't see jobs I'm interested in or think I could do.  (Pause)  ... I could tell him what I've done. And we could go down to the shopping centre on the way home after the meeting.  So I can tell him what I plan to do too.

Mum: Sounds good to me.  Still, it's better to be able to tell what you've done than what you plan to do.

Not so enthusiastic

As excited as I have been about using CogStateTM to independently baseline A-Ones's cognitive functioning, and getting ready to try him out with C8 - Kids Cognitive Cross Training, I don't exactly have an enthusiastic partner in my venture.

Last night A-One went to bed early.  His sleeping patterns have become more erratic lately because he's been playing WOW on and off both day and night. However, after last night I thought 'You beaudy!  He's had a really good night's sleep.  His brain will be fresh. What a golden opportunity to begin the CogStateTM practice tests!'  I had been 'warming' him up to them over the last couple of days. Waking him up mid-morning:

Mum: Hi A-One. Time to get up. After such a good night's sleep, let's get started with your round of practice tests today.  How about you get up, eat, have a shower (it's been several days), and we can get started.

A-One: OK, I'll get up, but we'll see about the practice tests.

Later on as he was having breakfast ...

Mum: When will we get started? This afternoon sometime?

A-One: No! I'm not doing it today!

Mum: A-One, this is a golden opportunity because you had such a good night's sleep! Your brain will be on fire!

A-One: I'm not doing it today! 

Mum: The scientists have proven that you need adequate sleep, nutrition, physical exercise, as well as mental exercise for your brain to be healthy, so it's important that you've had adequate sleep to do the tests.

A-One: How do they know that? I'll prove that I can be fine without even 5 hours sleep!

Mum: Do you see that this brain training work is about helping you be able to have a job, and not just a job, but a good job? What will you do instead today?

A-One: Other things.

Mum: Do you think your WOW friends would be happy for you to spend some time away from them, improving things for yourself?

A-One: Yes.   

Mum: Well, can we do it tomorrow?

A-One: Yes.

Mum: What time?

A-One: I don't know!

Mum: How about 10am?

A-One: OK.

Mum: It may take about 3 hours all up.

A-One: Three hours! How come?

Mum: The practice will take about an hour or more, so that you get used to what you have to do.  Then we do the real baseline test, which will take just as long.

A-One: No, we're doing only the first part.

Mum: So when will we do the second part?

A-One: The next day, Sunday.

Mum: I can't do it Sunday because Dad and I have something on Sunday morning.

A-One: Well, whenever is the next time!

Mum: You do realise, don't you, that improving things for yourself can start right now?

So instead today, I'm blogging ... and he's WOW'ing.

It takes work to reach your goal

A-One: I know! I know what I have to do Mum!

A-One's response to my urging him to start looking at websites that might guide his efforts in looking for employment. Are his job goals realistic?  What steps to find out more?

I had selected a blog to encourage him to stick with the discipline required to make progress, hoping he'd make the connection with the consistent effort required to make his brain training work, and the work required to find a suitable job.

Mum: What do you think this blog is about?

A-One: It doesn't mean anything to me.

Mum: Well, what did Aristotle say?

A-One read it again: That we are what we repeatedly do.

Mum: And how many hours before you become an expert at anything?

A-One: They reckon 10,000 hours.

Mum: That could be about 5 years.  Is there anything you're an expert at?

A-One: Well, there'd be things I'm pretty good at, but I'm not an expert.

Mum: ... let's move on.  The next thing to look at is this website to help you see if you'd like to have any of these jobs.

A-One selected 'Nature and Recreation' then 'Performing Arts'.  It was the recreation part he was interested in, not nature.  He eventually looked at sound/audio technician.  Then an audiovisual technician.

A-One: I want to work in music, not TV, and music I like.  Like an assistant disc jockey.

Mum: So why don't you Google 'DJ careers' to find out more about it?

A-One: No, I've done enough of this.

Mum: How might you get into the DJ industry if you don't find out more about it, or even if you would like it?  This is the work that it takes.

A-One: I am working at it.

Mum: Do you have 'DJ' set up for any of your job alerts?

A-One: No.  I'm not having this conversation! Stop going on about it!

Mum (sighing): Tomorrow we'll need to work on getting all your papers in order so that you can find your correspondence from Centrelink and to complete your tax return.

I went away, Googled 'DJ careers', and sent him a link which showed a little of what customers like in a DJ.  Later I asked him, do you think you'd like to do that, be like that?

A-One: Maybe.

A Centrelink appointment ... for?

We visited Centrelink this morning to attend an appointment for people on disability pensions who are looking for less than a specified number of hours of work per week. At our last meeting with A-One's Disability Employment Services provider, A-One's target hours per week were recorded as 8-16.  He had received a phone call from Centrelink inviting him to attend an appointment to talk about how he's going; to make sure he's not falling through society's cracks; that he is making progress with his employment goals, and has some engagement with community.

A-One: I'm nervous about this appointment.  I hope they don't ask me any questions I'm uncomfortable with.

Mum: What type of questions might they be?

A-One: If they ask me what else I'm doing besides looking at emails for work.

Mum: How would you answer?

A-One: That I watch some TV, do some reading, play some X-Box games, play computer games.

From where I stand, he seemed to have reversed the order, but I let it pass. Instead I posed some questions he might get.

Mum: What about friends?

A-One: Yes, I talk to them.

Mum: How do you talk to them - call? email? Facebook?

A-One: Facebook.

Mum: When was the last time you talked to them?

A-One: It's been a little while.

Mum: How long is 'a little while'?  Before? After? Christmas?

A-One: After Christmas was the last time.

He observed the security people in the Centrelink office so we went on to discuss why they might be there, when his name was called.

The Centrelink officers were friendly, but the process for the interview seemed to be very perfunctory.  We were advised that this was a new initiative of the federal government, and that his participation was entirely voluntary; that they had a set list of questions to ask and that the outcome would be a plan which he would sign.  The timeframe for any plan could be long term, for example five years.

My impressions?  Accepting A-One's responses at face value with no insightful questioning as to what might really constitute barriers to employment.  In response to A-One's stated goal of becoming a sound engineer or assistant DJ, there was some brief discussion about a TAFE course, but they simply noted that A-One was not doing it. They stressed to A-One that he share his employment goals with his Disability Employment Services (DES) provider.  They gave A-One a glossy package containing a pen, a notebook, and a copy of his signed 'plan' which stated his employment goal which, as he said, is already on his resume anyway. I came away with the feeling that they could tick off another box in 'assisting' people; it seemed more like a bureaucratic overhead.

Our discussion on the way home seemed to provide more insight that I thought such an interview might have drawn out.

A-One: I don't  mind doing study that is hands on, like making sure that everything is connected properly, but I'd struggle if I had to do assignments that required writing.  Even games testing would be good, but I'd have difficulty writing reports of the tests.  There are problems with WOW, but I don't know if the WOW developers would think they are problems.

Mum: There's a website where you can submit problems with WOW - perhaps you could start small by practising reporting bugs there?

A-One: You see, in WOW my character is at level 90 and I've been trying to get a recipe for food for health - you can restore the health of your character with food.  It's at level 60, which should be really easy for me, but I've been trying for years to get it and still haven't - that's very frustrating. You see I like to collect full sets of things, and ...

... and so on for the rest of our trip home.

Coping with a change in disability employment service provider

Even though it was Sunday yesterday, A-One did his Lumosity training.  He had been reminded by his father, and didn't protest that it was the weekend.  However, he hasn't yet done his training today.

He's still plateau'ing in his scores, so no change much yesterday.  No information processing or working memory games, but he gained another PB again for the cafe game (familiar faces). He's really strong on that one.

 

This morning we attended an appointment with a new disability employment service (DES) provider, specialising in intellectual and learning disability, the only one in Queensland.  We have the usual hoops to go through, as we did a couple of years ago, including a Job Capability Assessment (JCA) at Centrelink next Monday. 

 

While his previous DES provider was good too, I was keen to try this new one due to their specialty. This one had been recommended to me by someone at the workshop I attended at University of Queensland last year.

 

A-One: Do you think the other DES people will think badly of me for changing? I don't want them to think badly of me because they were OK.  Sometimes they'd give me a lift to the bus stop, or even drive me home.

Mum: I expect they may be disappointed in losing a client, and I don't want to leave on bad terms either.  We'll give them a courtesy call to thank them for all their help, and tell them that this new service specialises in disabilities like yours, so we'd like to try it.

I'm glad that A-One is tuning into interpersonal aspects. I've seen him make similar comments when contemplating changing guilds in WOW too.

Both a tortoise and a hare

It's been over a week and A-One has had no calls about going back to work. Despite our urging to make contact to show his interest, he has heard nothing and has not been willing to make the phone call.

So I did.

He has been registered with a disability employment service for several years, and they found him his current job.  I spoke to his consultant.  I had wanted to call her anyway to let her know about A-One's brain training work, and to let her know how it has been going.  I also mentioned the Arrowsmith program and how I have joined an advocacy group to bring the program to Australia.  It was not one with which she was familiar.

Of most interest to me was the feedback she gave about A-One's work.  She found that A-One worked really well on some days, but was very slow on others.  He worked best when there was someone there all the time encouraging him with 'You can do it A-One'.  When there wasn't anyone there he was very easily distracted, or would do the same thing over several times when it wasn't really required.  His work buddy was able to complete the whole job sooner on his own than when they worked together and was not returning to the job. So A-One's job is on hold until they can find someone else to be his work buddy.

That certainly consolidated for me the consistency of our experience of A-One:

• at home
• his first job after he left school (Life since school)
• this job (It's all in the timing)

I spoke with A-One about it.

A-One: Why did you phone up? That's not your business!

Mum: Because Dad and I wanted to know what was going on.  We wanted some idea as to when you might be going back to work.

Mum: We're hearing again that even though you know the job very well, it's the inconsistency in your pace that is difficult for employers.  You often tell me 'I know' when I remind you about doing things, and it's clear to me that you can readily learn a job, but you need help in doing it at a consistent pace.

A-One: My work buddy probably got sick of me.

Mum: I don't know anything about that.

A-One resumed playing WOW  as I was speaking to him.

Mum: Could you take your character to a safe place and pause the game while we're talking about this?

A-One: I can listen to you while I do this.  See I'm responding to you?

Mum: That's pretty amazing seeing your auditory processing is somewhat impaired ....

Mum: Remember your cooking plan which includes the times of when to do things (It's all in the timing)?  What if you do that for other jobs so that you can do them at a more consistent pace, and improve your work prospects?  Use the clock as your friend to check things off against the time on the plan. Remember how I tell you to take note of the time when you start and finish jobs? We've been trying to tell you this, but you haven't wanted to know.

A-One: I get it Mum.





Later on A-One came downstairs and asked me which additional games he should play today.

That's a first. 

Clocks are only for telling the time!

A-One duly completed his Lumosity training this morning.  He gained a new personal best for the flexibility game which requires him to recognise shapes, but continues to plateau (down actually) on memory and problem solving.  His speed is now over the 40th percentile, memory and attention up around the 20th percentile, but problem solving remains doggedly around the 2nd percentile. Overall he is over the 14th percentile for his age group.

When I mentioned moving on to the clocks and reading comprehension:

A-One: No! I know the clocks! I don't need to do any more clocks!

Mum: The next stage is to add a 4th hand.

A-One: No! I'm not doing any more clocks!

Mum: You realise it's about training that part of your brain that is good not just for reading clocks, but for other things too?

A-One: No! I don't need to do that!

Mum: OK. Well let's move on to some reading.

A-One: No! I don't need to do that either!

Mum: The reading this morning is different from last week's.  (I had planned to use the first paragraph from the Inquirer section of The Weekend Australian.)

A-One: No! My reading's OK.

Mum: Do you realise why we're doing this?  To improve your chances of getting a job so that you can keep yourself - especially after we're gone? What will you do then?

A-One: I don't know. I don't want to talk about it anymore!  Stop trying to make me do it!

A-One immediately brought up RuneScape and started telling me more about a feature that he'd pointed out to me yesterday.

Patience!

My regular physical exercise includes cardio and weight/resistance work.  I wonder if negotiating with A-One also gives my mind a mental workout.  My father-in-law commented once after A-One spent some holidays with them, "A-One is such a blessing. He really teaches you patience!"

After feeling despondent on Friday, I stepped back a little for A-One to choose his own time for brain training over the weekend (only Lumosity, no clocks).  In the context of WOW, we had some discussions about agreeing with others to do things at or by a certain time.  A-One understands the concept, ably articulating the courtesies about time commitments when playing WOW with others.

So how do we help him translate that to real life! I am endeavouring to incorporate some sense of timing/planning in our work together.  That is probably the most disabling of his cognitive impairments when it comes to his employability.

Anyway, he completed his brain training on his own for both days, again improving his overall Brain Performance Index (BPI).

This morning, he arose, completed his morning jobs and went straight to his brain training - again on his own.  I was on the treadmill when he came out beaming, "I've just unlocked the next level in the cafe game!"  We looked at his results, and his BPI chart rose more steeply today - yay!

Before we took up the clocks again:

Mum: I'll be finished my exercise in about 20 minutes, then we can get on to the clocks again.  This time we'll add a second hand.

A-One: Why do I need to do that?  Second hands aren't important to telling the time!

Mum: Mostly, that's true.  The clocks exercise isn't just about telling the time.  It's about exercising that part of your brain so that you can understand concepts and ideas better.  When you read something, you can read it very well, but you don't always understand what you are reading.  This exercise will help you understand what you read better.


I'm basing this on Barbara Arrowsmith-Young's experience where, after 3 months of doing increasingly complex clock exercises, she was able to read philosophy and understand it!

I had added seconds to the same exercises that he had done with just 2 hands, but kept the old exercises out of sight.  We started by looking at the second hand of a clock, so that he could count the 60 seconds around the clock for a minute.  Once he got the hang of that, he managed the first page of clocks pretty well.  I observed that for every clock he counted in fives around the clock for the second hand.

A-One: That's all I'm doing today!

What A-One doesn't know yet is that I plan to incorporate some comprehension testing into our program.  I may use a book of short stories, and start with a single paragraph, asking him what he thinks the key point is and what the story may be about.

Being work ready

A-One was willing enough to rise this morning when I woke him, and brought up the Lumosity login while still in his pyjamas. He was about to begin without me.

I reminded him that a work ready frame of mind goes with this important training and that showering and dressing sets the right scene and attitude for a day of exciting challenges! That his brain training is also about moving to a state of mind that goes with full-time employment, and the sooner he moves into this state, the sooner he can start building more success into his life.

I also reminded him that I need to be with him while he is training because I am recording what helps him and what doesn't. While not saying it out loud, I also want to be there to show enthusiasm and to encourage his efforts. 

He insisted that all he would do is dress, and shower later.

So on to today's brain training - improved results on most tests today, gaining a few more personal bests. He even got to the next level for one game - the cafe game where he gave the wrong orders yesterday. Yay!

Assessments

With our growing concern at the prospect of long term unemployment, earlier this year we took A-One to a neuropsychologist for some vocational guidance. She did some assessments with him, which essentially validated the same impairments that tests had revealed when he was 12 years.

At that time he was diagnosed with Pervasive Development Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified(PDD-NOS) at the mild end of Austistic Spectrum Disorders (ASD). To me that seemed to mean 'I Don't Know', so it wasn't very helpful to us in finding appropriate help, although we had done speech, physio and occupational therapy with him when he was little.


Nevertheless the educational psychologist working with him when he was 12 did some emotion face recognition work with him, and helped him with strategies to respond to bullying.

Today, I think he is sensitive to others' emotions and can respond to them, but not necessarily with a great deal of nuance.

Life since school

Some time after A-One completed school, a family friend offered him some office work in the mailroom. He protested vigorously at the idea of working 5 days a week, even as I virtually pushed him out the door on the first day. By the time he came home, we didn't hear any more protests about that.

He enjoyed the daily company of working with people, however over time it became evident that even though he knew the work backwards, his productivity was low. That's when we began the journey of the supported wage scheme and disability pension. Yet the variability in his productivity proved too much of a strain for the workplace, and that job came to an end after 12 months.


A-One became unemployed. We wanted to give him some space to see what might interest him; to allow him to start taking charge of his own life. Pushing him had been tiring for all of us.

With both A-One's father and me working full-time, we found that little happened in job searching unless we sat beside him searching job sites and assisting him with applications - which were few.